South Downs Relay · 2026
Lady Soggybottom Society Papers
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Lady Soggybottom Society Papers 💙💛
The South Downs Relay 2026 Edition
Dearest Gentle Runner,
It is with great delight that I report upon the latest exploits of the intrepid members of Ranelagh Harriers, who recently descended upon the rolling hills of the South Downs Relay. What promised to be a day of athletic endeavour on sunny picturesque vantage points soon transformed into an epic tale of perseverance, resilience, and the occasional farce.
The heavens, it must be said, were in a most foul mood.
Rain fell incessantly from dawn until nearly dusk, while fierce winds swept across the Downs with such enthusiasm that one wondered whether the weather itself had entered the competition. The conditions were so relentless that merely remaining upright became a noteworthy achievement.
Yet the weather was not the only challenge facing our brave competitors.
The journey to each stage start became an adventure worthy of its own report. Narrow country lanes forced delicate negotiations between relay vehicles and stubborn postmen, who surely did not anticipate becoming obstacles in a sporting contest. More than one runner, in their haste to reach the start line on time, managed to part company with their watch, leaving expensive technology abandoned in hedgerows whilst its owner sprinted onwards in a state of mounting panic.
Navigation, too, proved to be an unreliable companion. Several competitors from various teams found themselves exploring rather more of the South Downs than the organisers had intended, adding unexpected distance and elevation to their day's exertions. One suspects some discovered entirely new routes, though perhaps not intentionally.
Amidst these challenges, the Ranelagh veterans demonstrated both grit and class, securing a magnificent second place in the Veterans competition. A result thoroughly earned and richly deserved.
The ladies, meanwhile, produced a performance worthy of equal praise. Alas, official results do not always tell the full story. Through circumstances that many would describe as deeply unfortunate, and some as plainly unjust, the Ranelagh ladies were recorded as disqualified. Yet those present know that their efforts merited a well-earned third place among the ladies' teams.
Society, dear runner, may not always dispense justice, but it should at least record the facts.
No account would be complete without extending heartfelt thanks to the indispensable support crew. To Rick and Narissa, whose driving skills, patience, and logistical wizardry kept runners moving between stages despite the weather and the chaos, the club owes a considerable debt of gratitude.
Equal thanks must go to Ed for generously allowing his car to be pressed into relay service, ensuring the day ran as smoothly as conditions permitted with this writer’s bum slightly drier due to the wonder of modern technological advancement of heated rear passenger seats.
Finally, appreciation must be offered to the organisers, whose efforts made this remarkable event possible despite the elements conspiring against them. Most importantly, thanks are due to every runner, supporter, driver, and volunteer who contributed to the wonderful camaraderie that defined the day. For while positions and times may eventually fade from memory, the shared experience of battling wind, rain, navigation errors, and country lanes together is what truly endures.
And so, as soaked shoes dry and muddy kit is finally washed, the members of Ranelagh Harriers may reflect upon a day that tested them in every conceivable way - and emerged with stories that shall undoubtedly grow even more impressive with every retelling.
Yours most faithfully,
Lady Soggybottom💙 Women’s Team: Lizzie Broughton, Kate Voller Browning, Lucy Charkin, Aoife Kilpatrick, Edel McKeever & Suzy Whatmough
💛 Vets’ Team: Samuel Davies, Mark Herbert, Ed Perry, James Riley, Andy Starr & Nick Twomey
